The Road

Is anyone else as excited about this as I am? This is a perfect meeting of actor, director, and material. Viggo Mortensen can really do some solid work; I've loved what he's done in the last two Cronenberg films, particularly Eastern Promises. John Hillcoat delivered a fantastic western with The Proposition. Roger Ebert favorably compared that film with Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian in tone, and I have to agree with him wholeheartedly. And finally, the book. It's a taut, grim piece of work, but very engaging. While his characters continue the trend of minimal dialogue, the action moves along a lot faster, like in his previous book No Country For Old Men. Just like that adaptation's success in the hands of the Coen brothers, I think this story is suited to the big screen. Hopefully, it will help erase the memory of All The Pretty Horses.

This article from the New York Times isn't "new", but it's still worth checking out if you missed it like I did. It looks like the movie is done with principal photography and is set to open in November.

Greatest. Superhero. Movie. Ever.

So I saw a 4am IMAX screening of The Dark Knight, Christopher Nolan's new... Wait a minute. Who's been trapped under a large rock all year? I'm assuming it was a really wide rock, to miss all the posters and billboards. Honestly, it feels like the viral marketing has been going on for YEARS. It reminds me of the work done for Batman. Do you remember the advance marketing for Tim Burton's first Batman movie? The bat-symbol teaser trailer launched really early, at least really early for the time, stirring all sorts of speculation. Between that and the 1-900 hotline to decide if Robin died in the comic book, it was a great time to be a 7th grader enamored with the caped crusader.

But this is 2008, and I just saw The Dark Knight. Wow.



Let me go ahead and get this out of the way: Heath Ledger delivered a staggering performance. Menace and nihilism personified. But wonderfully charismatic. There were so many subtle touches. I loved his licking tic; it really sold the scarring make-up. I thought there would be a lot of baggage from Nicholson's take on the character, but it was never an issue. This really was Ledger's movie.

But if it was just one amazing performance in the midst of a mediocre movie, I wouldn't be this giddy. For all the talk that's bound to happen about how dark the tone of the movie is, I found it to be a LOT of fun. The base-jumping? Awesome. The "birth" of the Bat-Pod? Awesome. The Empire Strikes Back-esque take-down of a semi? You get the picture. I had a similiar feeling leaving this screening to leaving Casino Royale when that hit theatres. Sad as it may be, Batman and James Bond were heroes of mine as a child, and it's thrilling to see them treated with all due respect. Who knew there would actually be a Batman movie made that would seriously meditate on law and order, and the thin line you can cross into fascism? Without being preachy? A real achievement.

One minor gripe: Bale's "Batman" voice was sort of annoying. Like a bad Fat Albert impersonation.

2008 New York Asian Film Festival

So, a bit late, but here's my take on this year's New York Asian Film Festival.

First off, I had a great time. While this year's line-up expanded a lot from previous ones, I was only able to take in three. But all three were great films, including one I had been waiting to see long before NYAFF's lineup was announced. And free Sapporo after Sukiyaki Western Django didn't hurt my impression of the festival. Let's take these in chronological order, shall we?


Mad Detective (aka Sun Taam)

I have a confession to make: I've never seen a Johnny To film before. I took this festival as a chance to rectify that problem. First up was Mad Detective. This is the noir-ish tale of a police investigator who has the unique ability to see the spirits or "inner personalities" that dwell within other people. It allows him to see motivations and desires that aren't immediately obvious. While invaluable as an investigative tool, he isn't able to switch it off or turn it's gaze inward. He's shunned for his odd behavior, and further, isn't completely aware of it. It was an interesting premise that, fortunately, really delivered. The flawed superhuman concept reminded me of Unbreakable, yet not as dour in its execution. This story found a wonderful balance of humor with the darker material.

I imagine someone at a major studio is trying to figure out how to make this film a vehicle for Nicolas Cage. Let's hope that doesn't happen. I just read today that this will be getting a full theatrical run at the IFC Center. You can read more details here. So if you missed it during the festival, I suggest you don't make the same mistake twice.


Sparrow (aka Man jeuk)

This is about a group of four (very pleasant) pickpockets, whose tranquil existence is disturbed by the introduction of a mysterious woman. A wonderful parallel is drawn with a bird flying into the head pickpocket's apartment. He tries unsuccessfully to remove it, but it keeps returning. This movie is enchanting. And I don't use that word often. I actually felt pretty fuzzy leaving the theatre.

It was refreshing to see a new film that really understands how to use a score. Everything was kept very light, one could even say effervescent, without becoming cloyingly sweet. My favorite sequence is the shared cigarette in the car. It's already punching all the right buttons, reminding me of the shared cab scene in In The Mood For Love, one of my all-time favorite films. But the music takes a turn, that's reminiscent of Morricone's score to Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion. Specifically it brought to mind Mike Patton's cover of the main theme from Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion, with his vocal pop and slow exhale. Very sexy and very effective. Sparrow is a film I will be revisiting.

But now to completely switch gears...


Sukiyaki Western Django

Wow. This movie was MADE for me. A riff on Spaghetti Westerns? I LOVE Spaghetti Westerns! A new film by Takashi Miike? I love Miike! Everything I read about it beforehand just whetted my appetite. From the fact that all the actors would be speaking broken English to the climax being set in the snow a la The Great Silence, it all was fuel to the fire. But how did it turn out?

Anyone familiar with Miike's work knows his stuff is all over the map. I'd say that the only two constants I can point to are 1) a solid entertainment factor, and 2) an obsession with bodily fluid. This one didn't break any trends in that regard. But as a mash-up of Spaghetti Westerns? I thought it was amazing. Not only were references piled on top of one another (Django's coffin "surprise" makes an appearance), but the sense of real fun that most Italian Westerns had was on full display. They were ultimately popular entertainment, and I was most impressed to see that spirit remain intact.

Word from the festival was that this has been picked up for a US theatrical release, I believe later this year. Unfortunately, I have to agree with my friend Abe: if this movie opens wide, it will tank. The "Engrish" will turn off a lot of fans of foreign films, and the utter zaniness and moments of poetry will confuse people looking for an action movie. But for me: Christmas came early.

Ashes of Time Redux

This news is so old now, it's dusty. But it's a pretty big deal for me, and I realized I didn't mention it here. You can read more details here, but Wong-Kar Wai will be re-releasing his "action" movie from the 90's: Ashes of Time.


This film has been something of a holy grail for me. I fell for In The Mood For Love and 2046, and learned of Ashes of Time while diving into his earlier work. Unfortunately, the DVDs available for Ashes of Time look horrible. Like bad VHS. Like a dub of a bad VHS. But I don't have to worry about that now. The director has gone back and cleaned up the best surviving film elements, added some new music, and trimmed some fat. (The Redux is about 10 minutes shorter) After its debut at this past Cannes festival, Sony Picture Classics has picked it up and it will be released domestically in September. I'm a big fan of Christopher Doyle's (Wong-Kar Wai's long-time DP) work, and I'm honestly giddy about the prospect of seeing this cleaned up on a big screen. That's right: giddy.

Do you think it's possible this release is intended to soften the critical blow he received from his English language debut earlier this year: My Blueberry Nights?

Metropolis Uncovered!

Big news.

Anyone who has seen Fritz Lang's seminal science fiction film Metropolis, knows there's some missing footage. Some sequences jerk forward like a fifteen year-old with a stick shift. After its Berlin premiere in 1927, it was repeatedly cut down by distributors looking to shorten the running time. All we're left with today are those truncated versions, the original prints have long since been lost.

Or have they?

You should read more here and here, but it seems that the closest thing we have to Lang's original version has been uncovered in Buenos Aires. Sent to Argentina in 1928, this print has been in the hands of collectors, eventually ending up at the Museo del Cine where it was "rediscovered" in January. While significantly longer, this is still not the complete version. Exciting nonetheless!

I'm Sorry

I've been incommunicato lately. Tech rehearsals are definitely the least-sexy aspect of my decidedly unsexy job. But that is done now. So you can expect lots of posts to be flooding in now. I mean it. Hold your breath.

For now, enjoy this website I found: Bottom Half Nude. I like it so much, I'm posting a link in the right-hand column. Over yonder.

New York Asian Film Festival Is Back!

You can read more at Subway Cinema. They have the line-up posted now. I'm particularly looking forward to Sukiyaki Western Django, Miike's "spaghetti" western. Sounds right up my alley. I was actually stressing earlier this week about how much it would cost to order the DVD from Japan.

Thank you New York Asian Film Festival!

August Criterion releases

As reported by DVDBeaver, Criterion has announced their releases for August. They are:

Brand Upon the Brain! (Guy Maddin, 2006), Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom (Pier Paolo Pasolini, 1975), The Small Back Room (Michael Powell & Emeric Pressburger, 1949), Twenty-four Eyes (Keisuke Kinoshita, 1954) and Eclipse Series 11: Larisa Shepitko Box Set Includes: The Ascent (Larisa Shepitko, 1976), Wings (Larisa Shepitko, 1966)

I can't say I'm really excited about any of these, in particular another copy of Salo.

As a follow-up to my earlier post about the BAM screening of Choke, I think I now have a date and time to see it. The June 5 9:40 showing will have a talkback following. I'm there! Read more here.

Criterion goes Blu-Ray!

This from the latest Criterion newsletter:

"Dear Criterion Collection Newsletter subscriber,

We’ve got some exciting news for this fall, and we wanted you to hear it first.

Our first Blu-ray discs are coming! We’ve picked a little over a dozen titles from the collection for Blu-ray treatment, and we’ll begin rolling them out in October. These new editions will feature glorious high-definition picture and sound, all the supplemental content of the DVD releases, and they will be priced to match our standard-def editions.

Here’s what’s in the pipeline:

The Third Man
Bottle Rocket
Chungking Express
The Man Who Fell to Earth
The Last Emperor
El Norte
The 400 Blows
Gimme Shelter
The Complete Monterey Pop
Contempt
Walkabout
For All Mankind
The Wages of Fear

Alongside our DVD and Blu-ray box sets of The Last Emperor, we’ll also be putting out the theatrical version as a stand-alone release in both formats, priced at $39.95. Our Blu-ray release of Walkabout will be an all-new edition, featuring new supplements as well as a new transfer; we will also release an updated anamorphic DVD of Nicolas Roeg’s outback masterpiece at the same time."

I'm very excited about Bottle Rocket. I knew they were working on a release of the film, but it's great that I can get it in Blu-Ray. Chungking Express is also new to Criterion, a film I have a love/hate relationship with. But I'm sure Christopher Doyle's work will look amazing in hi-def. Wong-Kar Wai fans may also be interested in Kino's first step into the Blu-Ray waters: Fallen Angels. You can read the details here. I say, bring on a decent edition of Ashes of Time!

My worry, with all the Blu-Ray hoopla, is that we're going to see fewer older titles released. Soon, the double-dipping will really start. Instead of finally seeing a decent DVD or Blu-Ray copy of Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion, we get crap like this. I mean, it's a cute movie, but who was beating down doors asking for this?!?

Hi-Def Region Coding...

Just thought I'd share this region coding map for Blu-Ray. As you're probably aware, standard definition DVDs are locked into 6 regions. That way, a consumer in South America can't watch a movie sold in the Asian market. To make a long story short, it's all crap, and it's why I own an All-Region DVD player.

Blu-Ray discs are split into 3 regions. It's interesting that North America and Japan/Southeast Asia are the same region. Most of the non-Region 1 SD DVDs I purchase are Japanese. So that works out in my favor.

You can also see this map here.

No Strippers for now...

It appears I got blocked on the Zombie Strippers! front. After a short couple of weeks, it has left NYC's fair screens. Poop, I say. Poop. I guess that's what Netflix is for...

I've been hearing rumors of X-Box 360's equipped with Blu-Ray drives showing up later this year. This from well-meaning friends who would rather I play Halo 3 with them. I loved Halo. Don't get me wrong. I bought an X-Box purely to play Halo 2. But there's something unsettling and undignified about wearing a plastic headset while playing a video game, the whole time listening to the most bigoted, racist bile come out of little kids' mouths. Plus it doesn't go well with my robe. Did I mention I like to go into full-on Lance mode when I'm home relaxin'? I just want a PS3 to play Blu-Ray movies, like the copy of Blade Runner I already picked up. I also want to waste a lot of time on GTA4. Besides, as far as those X-Box rumors go, I agree with this guy.

It's been awhile...

Wow. I haven't written anything in over a week. 1) I've been working, and 2) I haven't seen anything new or noteworthy. I do really want to see Zombie Strippers! (the exclamation point is part of the title, but I really do want to see it) I've heard nothing but good things. I'm also mildly interested in Iron Man. I understand that Robert Downey Jr. is great in it, and I'm a huge fan of his work. I think I'm just a little burned out on comic book movies. Does that mean I loose my geek credentials?

How's this for geeky? I just bought a new HDMI cable to replace the one hooked up to my DVD player right now. There's some minor distortion with my current one. You can notice that sometimes black isn't "true" black. I'm about to spend an hour or so doing some tests with the old cable and the new one. Exciting!

My new cable is from Blue Jeans Cable. I've been meaning to replace my crappy cable, but this little story prompted me to do it sooner rather than later. I hate Monster Cables, but I had no idea how pushy they are. If you have a moment, and love seeing the underdog make good, check it out. It's an interesting read.

The Hobbit (Parts 1 & 2)

So, the fat Spanish dude is going to replace the fat dude from New Zealand. You can read more in Variety, but it's now official: Guillermo del Toro will direct two feature films based on The Hobbit. The Hobbit is a kinda-sorta prequel to The Lord of The Rings trilogy, even though the tone is different.

I do have faith in Del Toro. When Jackson was first announced by New Line to direct a series of live action adaptations of The Lord of The Rings, it seemed ludicrous. But I thought about what he did with Heavenly Creatures, particularly the fantasy elements, and I was confident he knew what he was doing. This time around, I've got Del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth to bolster my confidence. Plus, Peter Jackson is executive producer, with his company WETA along for the ride.

The real question is: who will play Bilbo? Is Ian Holm too old?

Choke!

So, this might not be the newest of news, but I've been away for a bit. My friend Brandi pointed this out to me over a week ago, but here's the run-down from the Hollywood Reporter. Apparently, BAM does a run of the highlights from the recent Sundance Festival (May 29 - June 8). The one I'm most excited about is Choke.

It's based on the Chuck Palahniuk book of the same name, and stars Sam Rockwell. I'm of the opinion that Sam Rockwell is a fine actor and have been a long fan of Palahniuk's work. So I guess you could say I'm excited at the prospect of seeing this well in advance of the official release.

Random tangent: Choke is being distributed by Fox Searchlight. Fight Club was also distributed by 20th Century Fox. Fox also made and distributed the Russ Meyer masterpiece Beyond The Valley of the Dolls. (which, in case you didn't notice, is where the title of this blog originated) Beyond The Valley of the Dolls and Fight Club have to top my list of Movies-That-Were-Inexplicably-Greenlit (And-I'm-Eternally-Grateful-For). It's a cumbersome title, but apt. Let's see, an X-rated epic by a nudie-cutie director who never helmed a studio film. Then we have a movie following the charismatic leader of an underground boxing club, which grows into an anti-capitalist terrorist organization. I love both these films. The first time I watched both of them, I was simply amazed that a major studio financed and put out these two subversive films. It's kinda like the adage about a monkey behind a typewriter...

I hope I'm not building up my expectations for Choke.

...and another thing...

Shine A Light really stuck with me. Apparently, I'm not alone. An astute analysis at Movie Maker precedes their list of the Ten Greatest Rockumentaries Of All Time. Their words. Neat stuff though.

...while we're on the subject...

After the movie on wed, we all came back to my place for more booze and Rolling Stones talk. You just can't watch that movie and then go right to sleep!

Through the course of the night, I thought of my favorite use of a Rolling Stones song in a movie. There's so many great choices by Scorsese (among others), but my personal favorite has to be what Wes Anderson did in Rushmore. The song he uses is I Am Waiting off of Aftermath. It starts 57 minutes and 30 seconds into the movie. (a minute or so into chapter 16 on the Criterion release) The song plays under a montage showing Max Fischer taking the bus to work, cutting hair at his father's barber shop, and avoiding all outside contact. Basically it's the rut that Max's life has gotten stuck in. The movie as a whole is a testament to Wes Anderson's skills, as well as Jason Schwartzman's acting talent. How can you make a spoiled private school kid so sympathetic? But that montage sums up so much about the film's core ideas; about Max trying to find his place in the world.

Anyone else out there have any favorite uses of a Rolling Stones song in a film? Don't be shy!

Shine A Light

Like I said in my last post, I saw Shine A Light at the Lincoln Center Loews IMAX. Martin Scorsese directed this mash-up of two concerts from late 2006 with some vintage interview clips thrown in. While not as deep as The Last Waltz, the live performances have an undeniable immediacy and power to them.

I must admit to a certain personal bias. I'm a big fan of The Rolling Stones, in particular their musical output from 1966's Aftermath through 1972's Exile On Main Street. I'm also a big fan of Jameson Irish Whiskey. So the bottle of Jameson I brought into the theatre, along with some classic songs from the Exile days, made for a great experience. I counted four songs from Exile On Main Street alone. I was glad to see more obscure songs played, as I could go the rest of my life without having to hear Satisfaction again.

If you have any interest in the band, you will love this movie! The Rolling Stones have so much energy live, and it's hard not to get caught up in it watching this. I found myself singing along a couple of times. (again, I'm going to point my finger at the Jameson) I feel this will be a much better viewing experience in the theatre. Somehow I don't think it will be the same, nestled up at home on the couch. So while this won't have the lasting power of Gimme Shelter, it was a great document of the Rolling Stones live today.

And I had a great time! Recommended in IMAX.

The Waiting Game

With work, I haven't been able to watch anything in the past couple of days. Nada. Tomorrow I'm going to see Shine A Light in IMAX, so I'm sure I'll pass along my thoughts on that soon enough. I'm a big fan of some early Rolling Stones, so I may be a bit biased.

In the meantime...



November will be cool.

...and Birth Of A Nation is a real HOOT!

I watched most of that 1925 silent Wizard of Oz that I recommended earlier in the week. I'm sorry, but I was wrong. It's bad. Real bad. I've updated my earlier post accordingly.

The Godfather...finally

I know. Technically, the Godfather has already been released. I just read this item here and here. It seems that Paramount has finally decided to jump into the 21st Century and give The Godfather Trilogy the restoration it deserves. I love the first two movies in that series, but have always shied away from purchasing them due to the image quality. The high grain, particularly in low-lit scenes, is distracting.

Thought I'd share.

original music, anyone?

A short one for today. Sorry, things are busy.

But not too busy. This afternoon I watched The Descent. (I know. About time, right?) And yes, watching horror movies in the middle of the day is kind of a cop-out. But it was really overcast, so I didn't think it would kill the atmosphere.


I'm mildly claustrophobic, so I'm probably a little biased. I thought it was a tight little movie. It took it's time building up and most of the characters were well-written. It got me to bump Dog Soldiers higher up in the queue.

One thing did stick out to me. Did anyone else notice the John Carpenter-esque music cues. They sounded straight out of The Thing. Which wasn't a bad thing. (seriously, no pun intended) They worked into moments with mounting tension and paranoia, and The Thing is a case study in mounting tension and paranoia. So I thought it was a pretty clever nod. But when I heard it again, I started to wonder: Is this an homage, or is that the exact same "doong doong" from The Thing? And how do you copyright "doong doong?" Anyone else notice this?

It's a Global Closet Thing...

Trapped In The Closet is brill-tarded.


The lovely burlesque performer Gigi LaFemme coined the term "brill-tarded" last year at a Brooklyn Wasabassco show. For the slow ones here, brill-tarded is something that is simultaneously brilliant and retarded. And of course, I'm not referring to mental retardation when I say "retarded." I'm referring instead to its common usage on America's playgrounds, as something devoid of merit or status, something backwards. Trapped In The Closet is a text-book example of brill-tarded. It is nearly artistically void, relying on a growing number of stereotypes and cliches with each passing chapter. And yet, it is ... well, brilliant.

I'm not going to give a plot synopsis here. It would ruin the fun of watching this for yourself. Besides, if you NEED to know what's in store for you, read imdb's list of plot keywords for Trapped In The Closet. Trust me, the story doesn't get much deeper than that list.

Most chapters build up to a "cliffhanger", milking the melodrama for all it's worth. But it's not the story arc that deserves attention, rather the way the story is presented. R Kelly sings all the dialogue and blocking, while different actors lip-sync and go through the motions. This would be a good time to mention that R Kelly plays several of the characters himself.

I know, it sounds like a train wreck. Just bear with me.

As I watched this for the first time, I must admit I was laughing at the absurdity of the whole thing. But slowly I warmed to it. I actually was impressed with how he gave the different characters a distinct voice. Sometimes, as is the case with the fat, Southern white girl Bridgette, he goes deep into parody. But I was already along for the ride by then. As dumb as this may sound, there is a certain earnestness to it that pulled me in. If you listen to the commentary on chapters 1-12, you realize he is very serious.

This might be a good point to address the commentary track. Unlike traditional versions, you actually see Kells viewing the movie, a la Mystery Science Theater 3000. He spends as much time talking as he does smoking a cigar, and it takes him a while to warm up, but MAN! It is worth the wait. So post-modern!

So, in short, this is the most campy fun I've had since watching the Adam West Batman as a kid. You owe it to yourself to check it out.

More Wizard of Oz...

As you might have guessed from my earlier post, I own a copy of The Wizard of Oz. When looking for it on the secondary market, I had the choice of a single disc edition, a 2-disc edition, and a 3-disc edition. As usual, I stopped off at DVDBeaver to do a little comparison shopping. That knocked out the single disc immediately. And after further research, the price jump from the 2-disc to the 3-disc was small enough that I decided to go for broke. After some carefully timed bidding/sniping, I picked up a used copy of the Super-King-Daddy-3-disc-Uber-Edition Wizard of Oz DVD on eBay. Hooray!

Then it sat on the shelf. And sat. I pulled it out last week to confirm some of the things I said in my earlier post on synchronicity, then returned it to the shelf.

Well, last night I pulled it out to check out the supplemental material. Disc 2 had stuff related to the 1939 film. There were some interesting anecdotes, but it was PR fluff for the most part. Then I put in Disc 3...


Disc 3 is mainly devoted to pre-1939 film versions of the Wizard of Oz. Surreal stuff. Most of the silent films remind me of Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. It's like a bunch of kids with dopey but inspired costumes stole their neighbor's camera. Let's make a movie! While charming, it's the 1925 silent feature and the 1933 cartoon (both titled Wizard of Oz) that kick the whole thing into overdrive. Since they draw inspiration from the same illustrations as the 1939 MGM film, there's definitely similarities. But it's fascinating seeing these familiar characters that aren't using Judy Garland & Co. as a springboard. I love the somewhat slinky Dorothy in the cartoon.

I wish that third disc was available as a stand-alone purchase. Then I would recommend it to everyone.

And by the way, I haven't forgotten about that Trapped In The Closet review...

UPDATE

So, I finally watched the 1925 silent Wizard of Oz. On the plus side, you get to see Oliver Hardy take a crack at being the hero, or rather the Tin Man. Cons; well, there's a few. Most of the film is a vanity project for the writer/director/actor: Larry Semon. He plays several characters in the film, and basically builds the story around himself. Who knew The Wizard of Oz was all about the Scarecrow? As well as being subjected to his lame slapstick, he throws every racial stereotype in the book at the screen. I let the first couple go by and just rolled my eyes. It's from 1925, there's bound to be some out-of-fashion humor. But by the time the Cowardly Lion was revealed to be the lazy, watermelon-stealing black dude; I decided I'd had enough. I shut it off before he could do more harm. What if the Wizard turned out to be a Grand Wizard of the KKK?

Watching this right after the R Kelly commentary on Trapped In The Closet was too much. I felt pretty dirty. I'm going to have to watch all of the 1933 cartoon, but I'm backing down from my endorsment of the 1925 feature.

On the flip side, the movie does have more gay subtext and double entendres than Top Gun! The 1925 Wizard of Oz. Top Gun is still a lot gayer than Trapped In The Closet.

Phase IV!

So, props go out to Doering for pointing me towards this news item. Legend Films have acquired the rights to some of Paramount's back-catalogue, including Phase IV! I first heard of Saul Bass's trippy ant movie when its trailer showed up on the 3rd (?) volume of Synapse Film's 42nd Street Forever series. I have an earlier release by Legend Films, Carnival of Souls. I feel certain that even if they add some schlocky special features, (like commentary by Mike Nelson of Mystery Science Theater fame) the disc will still look good. Maybe not Criterion good, but good.

ANTS!

Yo Joe!

So, I'm not going to get the Trapped In The Closet review up today afterall. In lieu of that, I'll present some GI Joe PSA parodies, to celebrate the absurdity that is the forthcoming live-action GI Joe movie. Enjoy!

...and my personal favorite...

Another Casino Royale DVD...

As reported here and here, Sony is going to pump out another DVD (as well as Blu-Ray) of the last James Bond film. Kind of makes you NEVER want to buy anything when it comes out, since there's going to be an even bigger, splashier copy right around the corner. But since studios base the release of future editions off the previous ones' sales, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. I am guilty of buying my Sean Connery 007 movies all over again after the Lowry restoration, but that was a real upgrade. I mean, Dr. No looked like a new movie. For me, the film is all that matters. Supplemental material is just icing on the cake.

So, if I buy that 5-disc Bladerunner, does that mean an 8-disc one is right around the corner?

Real Talk!

Credit goes to my buddy Yusuke for pointing me towards this. If you haven't seen it yet, you are in for a treat. Real Talk!



"Bitch, I wish you WOOOUUULLD ..." Okay, so I know this isn't for everyone. If you enjoyed that though, check back tomorrow for my breakdown of Trapped In The Closet. It is by far, the most awesome/dumbest thing I've seen in a while. Real Talk!

Hunky Black Tiger

So, I'm going to admit a guilty pleasure here. It's a hobby of mine that I don't talk about in polite company. I like to watch movies, and give them completely new scores. There, I said it.

I'm sure you're familiar with syncing up the Wizard of Oz with Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon. If you start the album right with the third roar of the MGM lion in the title credits, magic happens. You remember the introduction of this guy:

The Scarecrow flopping over the fence syncs up with the line "The lunatic is on the grass." There are more examples of this synchronicity. Coincidence? I've heard many a person debate whether this was done intentionally, whether Pink Floyd used the film as a framework for their album. I personally feel that A) that gives them too much credit, and B) doesn't matter in the slightest. When confronted with randomness, our brain attempts to connect the dots and make order. What's special about playing that specific album and film together is how many times they match up.

At the end of the day, I'm not really what you would call a Pink Floyd fan. But I am a fan of this synchronicity between two things that should make absolutely no sense together. Allow me to share some of my findings. Are you familiar with the film Tears of the Black Tiger?
I should point out that I enjoy the original music to the film. The reference to Morricone's For A Few Dollars More theme, as a greater reference to Thai (and other) Westerns blatantly stealing iconic score music was not lost on me. But again, this is beside the point. We're about to work magic!

First you are going to need copies of the DVD Tears of the Black Tiger, and the album Hunky Dory by David Bowie. Set your DVD to play at the beginning of Chapter 1. As in hit play and then immediately pause it. We don't want to be thrown off by player delays. In a separate player, Hunky Dory should be playing Eight Line Poem (track 3). Hit play when the song is at 2:16, which is right after David Bowie's last word in the song fades. Now enjoy!

Originally I synced this later in the movie to start with the beginning of the song Andy Warhol. So I can't vouch for the first 15 minutes of the movie, but the rest is gold. Comments on personal enjoyment are appreciated. Comments on me being full of crap are looked down upon but also appreciated in their own way. I'll try to post regular examples of this phenomenon; look for my Road Warrior/Nine Inch Nails sync-up in the future.

Come with me if you want to live!

My boo's birthday was this past wednesday. In all fairness, you can read her breakdown of the night's events here. We met up at 5 in the East Village to partake of some happy hour margaritas and bar food at La Palapa. In retrospect, more emphasis should have been put on the "food" part, but I'm getting ahead of myself. I arrived first and was greeted by ... plastic wrap and sawdust. Not a good start. I'm informed that they are under week-long renovations, but that I can take their chartered bus over to their West Village location. As I'm trying to politely bow out, they tell me that the bus will be running back and forth until 10 that night and will be passing out free drinks. And then the ringer: there will be a dj on board. No you didn't!

So I wait in the sawdust, because ridiculous opportunities like this don't come nearly often enough. Suzy shows up and had the same initial reaction as me. She had emailed her friends the itinerary, and wasn't comfortable skipping across town at the last second. I could be wrong, but I think the sight of the Colombian party bus was what pushed her over. We got on the bus. I'm not sure how this bus was sad and awesome at the same time, but it rode that line. Anyway, I had let slip earlier that it was Suzy's birthday. So everyone burst into a happy birthday song, complete with her name. At no point had I mentioned her name! The creepy factor only rose when this tiny lady dressed up as the Gordon's fisherman started dancing her ass off. Did I mention there were only 3 passengers on the bus? My fear was calmed by 2 margaritas though.

We arrived at La Palapa, and met up with some friends who we'd told of the venue shift. I had 3 more margaritas and a scrape of guacamole. I should mention that all I had eaten earlier that day was a small piece of meatloaf and a mealy apple. Not a good base. Well, La Palapa flew by, and before you knew it: bus time again. No fishermen this time, but I did have another margarita. Arriving in the East Village, we walked to the Continental. For those not familiar, the Continental offers 5 shots for $10. And these aren't limited to your standard well liquor. As in, I could order 5 shots of Maker's Mark. And did. Repeatedly. Bad news.

More friends showed up and good times were had by all. The bar was showing The Terminator on a projection screen, which was pretty cool. I remember ordering another round of Maker's and then almost falling off a bench while trying to plug a battery charger into the wall. And then that's it. My memory stops. I hear tale that I was kicked out of the Continental, and about a homeless man helping me up off the street, but I can't corroborate these stories. But I do remember the Terminator.

My review of my Mar. 19 viewing of The Terminator:

So, you've got this lady with muskrat hair being chased by the governor of California. (he used to be an actor?) She holes up in a police station with the guy from Star Trek 2 and the dude from Aliens. ("I prefer the term Artificial Person") They are all cocky and police-like until a car drives into the station. People get shot. Another dude from Aliens ("Stay frosty") shows up and says, "Come with me if you want to live!" More people get shot. The end.

I should eat more before I go out drinking. And I shouldn't hijack my girlfriend's birthday. Sorry baby!

Not really a review, but...

This is actually just a post to complain about Region encoding on DVDs. Sexy, right?

So I was looking at DVDBeaver today, and noticed they had a new image comparison up for Lost Highway. Side note: If you haven't checked out their site (and you're anal retentive about image and sound quality), you should bookmark it. They are THOROUGH. I started checking their site fairly regularly after I got my region-free DVD player.

So, a little background. A year or so back I bought my current copy of Lost Highway.

It was released by Cinema Club (?) on Region 2 exclusively in the UK. It apparently has the same transfer and special features as the MK2 release in France. Which is a good thing. MK2 does great work. So I shop around, and order a copy online. Now, I figure that it will eventually get released in the US. I know this. It's a David Lynch film; it has to get a domestic release, right? Well, you're forgetting about the ongoing litigation surrounding the murder of Robert Blake's wife. And how he was the prime suspect in that murder trial. You can catch up on that here. I assumed someone was doing Blake a favor by not releasing the film here. Other than playing one of the creepiest characters I've ever seen in a Lynch film, there's that whole wife-murdering storyline... But this is all conjecture.

What I do know is that Universal is finally releasing Lost Highway in Region 1. (Mar. 25 to be exact)

At first, I was a little perturbed. I found my copy on sale, but still...c'mon! The exchange rate with the UK isn't exactly favorable. You can read DVDBeaver's comparison yourself, but it looks like the only nice thing about this new release is the price. No DTS track, skin tones that are WAY too red, and absolutely no supplemental material.

I'm glad I didn't wait for the domestic release.

We'll Be Up And Running Soon...

So, here we go! Soon this site will be full of reviews of wonderful and terrible films. For now, it is this. Poo.